In the mid-1980s, gay men in the San Francisco Bay Area who called themselves "bears" met informally at Bear Hug (sex) parties and via the newly-emerging Internet. “For the people who say that being a bear is about letting yourself go, I say, well it depends on the bear ‘type’ and the ‘stereotypical’ lifestyle of a bear.Bears at the 2009 Marcha Gay in Mexico City I have two islands and of hair and a line, and I still self-define a bear. Sometimes mother nature doesn’t give you the gift of a hairy chest. “You don’t need to be hairy to be a bear. As part of the gay rugby community in Europe, I feel accepted for my size. “But the bear community does help me to feel included, and part of the broader-LGBT community. I feel sometimes very outcast because of the stigma that comes with that – that I must be lazy and not sporty. Nico is a bear living in Berlin, he says: “A bear typically has a more rounded figure, like myself. Here’s what a bear says about being a bear If you’re under 30 and want to be a bear, you might be calling yourself a Cub. If you’re over 50 or with grey/white hair, perhaps you call yourself a Polar Bear or Daddy Bear. If you’re an Asian bear, perhaps you call yourself a Panda. These are often the kind of bears you’ll find in porn. They may have bellies, a six-pac or both. We said it wasn’t simple didn’t we? There are ‘Muscle Bears,’ who are athletic, beefy and perhaps obviously, muscled. Different types of bear within the bear community Stereotypes are just wrong, but you probably know that already. Just look at the international gay rugby community, with its many types of bears, to flush away that rubbish generalisation. (Pexels)Īnother stereotype is that bears are lazy and unhealthy. Whether a bear is actually masculine, femme, cis or anything else has nothing to do with how they look.
The general stereotype that bears look “traditionally masculine” and are therefore, “masc” could not be further from reality. In gay porn, these physical traits combine to create a hyper-masculine attitude and aesthetic.
They are hunky, chunky, often with bellies, big legs, big butts and almost always with a full beard or facial hair. Many bear clubs and bars do not allow women, and this is often openly disputed on the doors of clubs, and then with heated debates on social media afterwards.Įven twinks or femme guys are turned away at the door of bear clubs for not being “beary enough,” especially if the club is close to becoming full.īroadly-speaking, a bear is hairy, with a large build and over 30-years-old.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, there have been cries that bear culture is anti-women, anti-femme and anti-trans. (Pexels) Toxic masculinity and divisions within the LGBTQ+ communityīut of course things are very rarely this simple. You don’t have to spend hours on a ‘look’ to fit into a bear club, and you don’t have to go to the gym. Bigger is often better, which bear bars and clubs like London’s original inception of XXL (as in the size), are testament to. It doesn’t matter what your waist-size is – you won’t be judged. The bears are arguably one of the friendliest and most inclusive groups of gay men, especially when it comes to appearance and body image. You could say that bears are the opposite of twinks.Ī f*** you to the unrealistic standards that we set ourselves as gay men to look young and fit, whatever our age. In “what is a twink?” we looked at how, as a group, twinks are often idolised for their youthful appearance and slim physique.